Due to the wrath of Multiple Sclerosis, I left my husband in Silver Spring, Maryland, and temporarily moved in with my parents in Gonzales, Louisiana. I give you the entire scoop in My Story. It was during that stay when I first turned to writing to keep me from completely losing my mind!
I stumbled upon an old journal entry from early 2010. I was fairly surprised to see what I found.
Friday nights are the hardest. I miss Tom. My dad is sleep. Mama is on her PC and/or the phone. She’s probably doing homework with classmates. She’s getting a Master’s degree.
It’s 9:58 Friday night. I’m pretty restless. The odd thing is, if Tom and I were together in any state we would most likely be doing something similar. Him watching TV and me working on this damn laptop. We stopped going out on Friday nights a few years ago. We use to call them “Fun Fridays” Pretty lame. I know.
If I could just drive everything would be better. I know it would. I want to leave this damn house. That is, on my own terms. I want to make it clear that though I complain, I am grateful. “The struggle between Damn and Thanks” is my daily reality. If I could just drive!
The interesting thing is at that very point in my life I was so much more physically disabled than I am now! Can you imagine? I thought the answer to all my problems was driving.
I mentioned leaving the house on my own terms, because I never really wanted to be relegated to my parents home without my husband. I had Multiple Sclerosis to thank for that! When I was in Maryland, Tom and I lived in a third floor walkup apartment building. If I stayed there any longer it would have been a fire hazard at the least and just getting from the apartment to the car had become a 10 minute ordeal. LOL! At the time it just felt like I was being kicked out.
Now, almost two years later I think I have finally gotten over not driving, but I do still feel a bit isolated. But I’m really not!
I think I just like complaining. Smile!